Becoming A Family Of Four


Jeans || Top || Hat (similar here) || Boots || Sunglasses || Addison’s Shirt (similar here) || Addison’s Bow 

 Happy Monday everyone!  I know everyone says they love this time of year because of the weather, or pumpkin spice everything, or because they are just ready for a change of pace and a new routine, and while all of those things are pretty awesome, ever since having kids this time of year has been particularly fun because of all the activities we can do together as a family.  One of my favorites is pumpkin picking and a few weeks ago we headed out to the East End of Long Island to the cutest pumpkin patch called Hank’s Pumpkintown.  We got there around 4pm on a Friday evening and had the place almost all to ourselves, which with a toddler that likes space to run, was pretty awesome. Addison had free reign of all the fun jungle gyms and her pick of any pumpkin she wanted. Since becoming a family of four we have made it a point to do activities that might be more fun for her than her baby sister, because lets face, it babies take up a lot of mom and dad’s time and attention so we want her to know that we have time for special activities that are just for her.

While I wouldn’t trade my little family of four for the world, it definitely has been a big adjustment over here, and honestly, anyone that says adding a new kiddo to the family was a breeze is probably full of it.  Addison has been doing really well, but she definitely has her moments, and those moments tend to come just when I am sitting down to feed Ellie, or put Ellie down for a nap, or really when I am doing anything where my focus is just on baby Ellie.  I get it, for over two years she was the center of our world, and she still is, but now she has to share the spotlight with someone else.  Her favorite phrases are “put Ellie in the swing” or “don’t feed baby Ellie mommy,” and I know it’s just because she wants me to sit and play with her, but each time she says those things it breaks my heart a little.

In the first few weeks we had Ellie home I thought I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t be a mom to two because my focus was constantly being divided, and I didn’t think I could give each of my girls the attention they deserved.  I kept thinking that I would never get the quiet moments with Eleanor that I had with Addison, or that I would never again be able to sit and snuggle with Addison by myself without having to cut it short to feed her sister or change a poop explosion.  And, for the first few weeks that was definitely true, but over time a new “normal” started to develop.  I am able to sneak in an uninterrupted breastfeeding and snuggle session or two in the afternoon while Addison is taking a nap and I have made it a point to keep Eleanor home with our babysitter or drop Eleanor at my moms’ so I can Addison out of the house by herself, just her and I, at least once or twice a week.  We go to a kids gym class with friends, or take a solo trip to the park, or if the weather is bad we snuggle on the couch and read a few books without her baby sister around.

There are also things that Addison does as a big sister that seem so natural.  She has become a master of putting baby Ellie’s “fire” back in her mouth (what she calls the pacifier), and cannot go to bed a night or wake up in the morning without giving her sister a kiss and hug.  I also love that now that Ellie is recognizing our faces and the sound of our voice she literally lights up and smiles when her sister enters the room.  At just three months old it’s like she knows exactly who she is and their bond is so strong already. To all the moms out there who are worried about how they are going to handle going from one kid to two kids or even more, let me first say, “you got this!”, and then let me tell  you it just kind of happens.  I don’t know how to explain it, and for me it wasn’t a walk in the park and I still have a lot to learn, but one day you just wake up and it just all makes sense, and you know you can handle it. Eleanor will be three months tomorrow and I know I have said it before but it’s hard to remember what it was like as a family of three because life is definitely better as a family of four.

xo Ali

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