Like many of you, I felt this holiday season went by in a blink of an eye. As usual, it is a slow (and sometimes stressful) build up to Christmas and the New Year and, then before I know it, I am taking down all the pretty decorations and I find counting down the days until the warm summer months roll around. These are the things that remind me why I started the Orlando Moms Blog to begin with.

Over the past decade I have celebrated an engagement, planned a wedding, got married, left a city I loved to move closer to family, bought a house, sold a house then bought another house, started not one, but two small businesses, gave birth to three beautiful baby girls and celebrated many more victories both large and small. With all of the happy times there were also plenty of not so pleasant and heartbreaking life experiences that have altered my view on how I live my life. I have experienced the loss of a pregnancy, saw some dear friends drift away that I thought would always be in my life, and have had to learn some life lessons when it comes to creating a business that I would most definitely not wish upon my worst enemy to name a few. The past decade has definitely been one of tremendous growth, but over this past year I have learned a few major lessons stand out over the rest.
You Cannot Be Everything To Everyone

Earlier this year I found myself crying during a conversation with my mom and aunt saying the words, “I have nothing more to give.” We were talking about a whole bunch of things and at the time I was referring to trying to be the best mom I could be, but it was the first time I said out loud that I cannot possibly be the best mom, best wife, best daughter and best friend at all times all the time. It was then I realized I don’t have to be. There are times when I will need to focus my energy on my business and there are times when my business will take a back seat and my kids will come first. Or there are times when my marriage will need to be my priority and maybe my daughterly or sisterly duties will have to be put on hold for just a little. I have learned the hard way spreading yourself too thin results in far too much stress and worry. Prioritizing and focusing your attention on the situation at hand is all you can do and the rest always falls into place.
There Is Beauty In the Imperfect

This goes hand in hand with my first lesson but takes it a step further. I will start by saying NO ONE IS PERFECT. Anyone that appears to have it all together all the time is just lying to you. Social media takes the idea of perfection to a whole new level and I promise it is mostly lies. As you scroll through Instagram and you see someone who has nicer clothes, or a cleaner house, or kids that always look well dressed and well behaved, it’s just a moment in their lives and not an accurate portrayal of their life as a whole. In fact, over the past year the word “perfect” just rubs me the wrong way. I have found it so refreshing to meet real, genuine people over the past year and it is these people that have inspired me to just throw the idea of perfection out the window. Don’t get me wrong, it’s hard to be vulnerable and expose yourself to criticism but admitting your shortcomings or accepting help when you need it is what makes you human.
God Gives You What You Need, Not What You Want

A good friend of mine told me this shortly after I found out I was pregnant with Scarlett and if the past few years have taught me one thing it is that in some sense, our lives are planned for us before we are even old enough to plan it out ourselves. We of course have choices we make that impact the outcome of what happens to us, but there are some things we cannot change. This past year I have found myself constantly questioning why life is unfolding the way it is especially out who I am as a mother. Having three kids 4.5 and under is really not what I had planned. I don’t want that to come across as insensitive and I hope that doesn’t offend anyone, but this really is not the life my 21 year old self would have imagined. Scarlett was really the shock of a lifetime and since having her I am constantly repeating these words to myself. I feel blessed and lucky to have the life I do, and while being a mother is always something I wanted, I never imagined being a mother to three beautiful babies so close in age. This small saying is also how I wrap my head around life’s tragedies both large and small and it has helped me make sense of things I cannot make sense of myself.
It’s Important To Find Your Tribe

You may have heard me talk about “finding your tribe” on my Instagram stories before but this one of the most important lessons I have learned over the past few years and I have relied on my ‘tribe”more than ever over the past year. It is so important make sure you fill your life with a support system. People who will listen to you complain, share in your victories, be a shoulder to cry on and most importantly tell you exactly how it is even if it isn’t what you want to hear. In 2019 the group of people I have choose to keep in my inner circle consists of those that can do all of those things are more. Life is messy and crazy and to me, trying to navigate it alone would be impossible.
Forgive, Forget and Move Forward

Life is really too short to sweat the small stuff and when I was younger I used to take everything so personally. Sometimes, you need to just forgive, forever and move forward. Holding a grudge or being angry wastes time and energy, two things I don’t have to spare. I’m not saying that we shouldn’t voice when we are upset or disappointed in someone or something, but when you hold in anger you miss out on what life has to offer.

As we say goodbye to 2019 I am feeling very hopeful for what the New Year has to offer. I don’t really like to set goals, mostly because I don’t like how we hang our successes and failures on a list of words, so this year I have a a general plan. A plan for my family, a plan for my business and a plan for myself. I felt in 2019 I focused a lot on my business and working towards carving out a small space in this crazy online world. I know I have only made a small dent in this area, but in 2020 I would like to shift my attention back to my family and my marriage. They are my foundation, my constants and without them I wouldn’t be who I am I need to reprioritize and focus on what is important to me, not what I think other people find important.

I want this year to be a year of growth not only for me but also for my girls. With three little kids spending quality one on one time with them can get tricky but I really want to make that happen this year. It is important for them to know who they are without their sisters and take pride in what makes them unique. Finally, spending more quality time with my husband without our kids is a big priority of mine this year. I love the time we spend together as a family, but I want to us, whatever that us is. We need to really spend time this year reconnecting on a level that is more than just mom and dad. I know this will be the toughest one of all, but I am so secure in the love we have that I know we will find out how to do this as the year goes on. As you can see I am still trying to figure out exactly what this bigger plan for new year is, but I know I will get there. So 2020, you may be the most exciting year yet.